Pancakes Are My Nicotine Patches

There’ll be no Sunday Steals today. Why? Because it’s my sodding blog, you buggering piece of– Alright, I never got around to making the list for today and I feel the need to write about pancakes.

Lately I’ve not been baking as much as I would like and it’s bumming me out. Not only have I done nothing related to Samuel’s 2013 Great Baking Escapade but I’ve done no real baking. Since moving to Amherst I’ve produced two cakes and… yeah, that’s it… When I made the move I had some delusion that because I was temporarily unemployed I’d suddenly have so much more time to bake. Well, first I had to get my life organized and then as my temporary unemployment became longer than I hoped for I realized that I didn’t have the financial resources to get buy all the flour, sugar, eggs, etc. that I wanted.

Pancakes have been getting me through.

I’ve known about the link between my depression and baking since high school. The alchemy of mixing and measuring has a soothing effect on my mood instability. When my mood crashes and dark clouds roll across my eyes I am buoyed up by the art of baking. My depression comes with a crippling sense that I’m losing control and producing a pie helps me. The first part of baking, the measuring and mixing, helps me establish a grip of control and the second part, placing the pan of pale yellow goop into the heat, helps remind me that there are some things I can’t control. My baking helps keep me to be happy and I’ve not been as attentive to it as I should be.

Like I said, pancakes have been helping me.

Yes, they’re not the cakes that one can frost and slice and serve after a nice roast but they’re useful. Though I can’t afford to be producing all the cakes and cookies that I’d like to I can afford to make a pancake dinner for myself or serve up some pancakes to my roommates on occasion. They’re simple and delicious and open themselves up to exploration. The recipe that I like best is the Joy of Cooking recipe. Please hold on with me

while I go on a brief tangent: When I started university and was separated from my parents’ severely battered edition I turned to Google to get my pancake recipe. What I ended up finding was a highly enjoyable Yahoo Answer’s request for the recipe I wanted. Not only did it provide me with the information that I wanted but I also got my daily dose of snark. Here’s a screenshot:

If you can't read this screenshot than click through to the source.

Look at how angry the original poster is when they realize that Charles C is lying to them. Look at how angry Charles C is when accused of lying. The bitterness that Charles C uses when spitting out “Happy?” is so visceral, so acidic that you can feel it burn. God I love the internet.

Let’s face it. We can all agree that this recipe needs vanilla extract. Now when it comes to adding vanilla extract to my baking mixtures I’m not a big fan of measuring. I just dump it in until I think it’s good and ready.  As I’ve begun itching to bake creatively I’ve started experimenting with what else gets dumped in. My roommate’s re-hydrated blueberries, Smucker’s raspberry jam, cinnamon and nutmeg, etc. Now that I’ve been bitten with the pancake bug everything I look at has started to look like it can go into a pancake. Ground beef? Why not! Yogurt? That’s an old one! Acrylic yarn? Bring it on! Fruit? That’s also an old one! Avocado? Fuck yeah!

What do you like to put in your pancakes? Greasy grimy gopher guts, perhaps? Chopped up birdie’s feet, maybe? Mutilated monkey meat, possibly? Let me know, I’d love some more ideas.

Look, this pancake came out a bit like a heart. It's probably a sign or something, I dunno. I do know that it was delicious and wonderfully nutmegy and cinnamony.

Look, this pancake came out a bit like a heart. It’s probably a sign or something, I dunno. I do know that it was delicious and wonderfully nutmegy and cinnamony.

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2 responses to “Pancakes Are My Nicotine Patches

  1. Yes to everything. When I was a kid, my grandfather would put food coloring in our pancakes.

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